How can I help you?
Issues I can support you with
As humans we have basic needs. The need to feel secure, to have attention, feel emotional connection, privacy, connection to other, a sense of self, status, meaning and purpose in our lives. When something goes wrong and these needs are not met, we can find ourselves struggling in some areas of our life.
Sometimes these needs are not met – maybe through our childhood or maybe they are forcible taken from us by others. This can lead to defence mechanisms being utilised (often unconsciously) to help us survive. In either case with the right help, these areas can be accepted into our lives, they can be de-sensitised to remove their toxic behaviours helping us live more fully and happy lives not only with ourselves, but also with others.
Relaxation & Anxiety
An experience that has caused stress or heightened emotions can leave a scar and it’s how we learn to cope and survive that is important, however, learning to relax and handle stress can be difficult and I offer relaxation and guided imagery sessions to help anyone who wishes to attend, they can be one on one sessions or group sessions and offer a half hour away break from life in a safe and secure, warm and accepting environment.
Communication is an essential part of life. Verbal communication is only about a 5% of our communication with non-verbal communication being the majority of our communication.
Do you feel that you are not heard, that others don’t understand what you are saying?
Communication affects every Relationship we have, both with others and ourselves. How many times have you felt that you wished you hadn’t bothered, or that it must be your fault, you are failing or you are to blame?
Low self-esteem and confidence can come from the wrong kind of communication or not getting the positive communication that you need.
Abandonment and loneliness are feelings we have when we have no-one to communicate with, and this can even happen even when we have relationships with others. Has someone you loved deeply left you in some way?
Do you feel that you are never really part of the group, an outsider? See others who appear to be valued by others, but never seem to feel that value?
Do you have someone in your life that you truly trust? Are you close to tears or angry often? Do your emotions often get in the way of you enjoying your life?
Long term health problems and disabilities
Have you been diagnosed with an illness like Cancer or where you born with a disability? Does dyslexia or aspergers affect your every day life, or do you experience phobias like emtaphobia or OCD?
All these things affect our life. Coming to terms with our own mortality or understanding why we have been given these problems to deal with is extremely difficult to recognise and accept, however, they can be incorporated into our lives and we can learn to live with them and accept the way they affect us with the right help.
Abuse, Trauma and Destructive behaviour patterns
Childhood abuse and trauma, Domestic abuse and violence and violation are devastating. They affect the whole of our lives and shape how we live. The coping and survival behaviours we develop to cope can also be as destructive to our lives as the event themselves. The human instinct is to survive, but what quality of life are we left with?
Abuse is about another’s control over us, whether that is restricting finances, using intimidation, violence, rape, emotional abuse, isolation, minimising experiences and feelings, denying and blaming, threatening, coercion or using a third party (like children) to exert power and control. It doesn’t have to have been exerted in a forceful way or in a destructive or conscious way. However sometimes it can be.
Abuse affects about 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men and it doesn’t have an age limit, it can happen to anyone.
Abuse can be very subtle and it is difficult when we are in this environment or have been in this environment to see what is happening, it is also incredibly difficult and frightening to get out of an abusive relationship or see a past one as having been abusive. It is shaming to feel that we have let ourselves get into these positions, however, it happens all too many times and the nature of it is designed to ensure that we do not recognise it or have the energy to change it. However, it can be survived with the right care and support.